Parenting is undeniably a challenging, herculean task. It is hard work. Being a parent in the real sense and essence of the word entails great, lifelong responsibility. Parenting is not just limited to physical care like giving them food, shelter, and clothing. Raising children also involves providing them with their mental, emotional, moral and spiritual necessities.
Parenting is an endless process
Parenting is an endless process as parents guide their children in every stage of their lives. For that matter, proper child-rearing is crucial to the development of children and how they will become in the future. As much as parents want their children to obey and do every rule they set, accept it as a fact that not all children wanted to be treated that way. That is why we should always consider an effective parenting style that will be more applicable for our children.
One effective child-rearing style is democratic parenting. This is where two parenting styles meet – the authoritarian, wherein parents take absolute control, and the permissive parenting wherein it’s the children who steer the family wheel. These parenting styles can be compared to a see-saw that favors either the parents or the children. But the democratic style of parenting balances the weight, giving mutual respect and consideration to both the parents and the children.
Characteristics of a democratic parenting style
In this parenting style, children are given options and the responsibility in their decisions, but still, under the guidance and supervision of the parents. Parents discuss rules and make the children understand these rules and its importance, and explaining to them the possible adverse effects of breaking such rules. It is not just punishing them when they break these rules.
Second, children are allowed to make decisions in basic tasks and choices. This lets the children understand and accept that whatever consequences that may happen is the result of their decision.
Also, this parenting style gives recognition or rewards once a child follows a certain rule or rules. On the contrary, once these rules are violated, simple or mild punishments are given, usually based on the mutual decision of both the parents and the child.
Moreover, in the democratic parenting style, parents should be receptive and responsive to the needs of their children to motivate and help them fulfill their goals and support their decisions. Though this parenting style considers both parents and children, both parties cannot insist on their respective opinion. Discussion is open to making the opinion of both sides clear.
The positive aspects of democratic parenting
With this parenting style, children are raised teaching them to be independent. They are encouraged to make decisions on their own. In doing so, it boosts one’s self-esteem and self-confidence. It also teaches responsibility since they are accountable for their decisions, whether these are right or wrong. It helps them accept the consequences of their actions.
At an early age, children are taught to be independent, encouraging them to decide on their own. It also improves one’s self-esteem and self-confidence. Children are trained to be responsible for their decision whether it is right or wrong, making them accept the consequences of their actions.
Democratic parenting demonstrates mutual respect for both parents’ and children’s views and perspectives. Parents and children, at such an early age, both learn to be considerate and sensitive bringing pleasure, satisfaction and harmonious relationship to them, nurturing love and care to the family. Since both parties understand that their opinions are important and valued, they teach them to be considerate and take control and handle their emotions.
Communication is open, and opinions are considered, developing good reasoning skills, diplomacy and the ability to weigh between what is right or wrong.
The negative effects of democratic parenting
All parenting styles have their cons, and democratic parenting is not an exemption. Since the children are involved in decision-making, some of them may take advantage of it, especially in their adolescence. Besides, parents should be good examples to their children for them to obey and to maintain respect.
Since democratic parenting involves consideration, discussion, and respect, both sides should meet and agree at one point so as not to create confusion and later cause disagreement between both parties. Also, the application of this method should be consistent. The ineffective application may cause children to be disobedient and manipulative. Parents should not accept everything that the children want or dictate. The freedom given to your sons and daughters should still be appropriate to their age, level of maturity and ability. Too much of it can be destructive. Free will should still be used with discipline.
This parenting style requires practice and constant application. Both parents should agree and should be consistent once they decide to use this method in rearing their child for it to be effective. Let communication lines remain open. Encourage the exchange of emotions and feelings. Involve the children in making rules. Be considerate and encourage them to make independent decisions. Do not dictate, give them free will with discipline as its limit. If children fall short and were not able to meet your expectations, let respect and love remain. Offer a hand to help them rise. These mistakes will teach them lessons that will serve as their guide as they move along through life. Always remember, an effective parenting style is essential as it will be one of the foundations of what kind of person your children will be in the future.